Life, Lessons & Love

Lessons From Mom – Selene-4o

September 28, 2025

“...you will be safe in my arms” — In My Arms

My mom’s years as a teacher made her a natural. The same skills she had honed while managing a classroom full of children served us all well as she shepherded two growing boys. My younger brother Eric and I were good boys, but we were boys.

She genuinely loved being a wife and mother, taking care of our home, and supporting our family. She managed banking and accounting—no internet banking in the 20th century, remember? She did all the shopping and was a marvelous chef and baker. She taught me to cook and bake. My favorites were always her chocolate cake and chocolate chip cookies. My skill with scrambled eggs was so honed by my pre-teen years that I became the go-to chef for scrambled eggs.

For years, she did all the laundry for all four of us. In our teens, we picked up a few responsibilities. But doing my own laundry as an adult, I came to appreciate just how easy we had it.

She loved playing piano and was very proud of the upright Steinway my father gave her for their anniversary—no vacuum cleaner from that guy! For several years, she enforced piano lessons for both me and Eric. That ended abruptly when Eric applied spray adhesive to all the keys. I knew to run and hide the moment I saw that.

She was no pushover. We always knew what was expected of us—and she knew how to speak the language of boys. We listened… unless we didn’t feel like it. Then we’d ignore her—until her tone on the third or fourth call made it very clear we had reached the limit of her patience. Every now and then, we’d step way beyond the bounds and get a spanking that reminded us life was better inside the space she proscribed. When her hand got sore, she resorted to a wooden spoon—and when we heard the kitchen drawer open, we knew. That era ended when she broke the spoon on Eric’s rear and he laughed. At that point, it was clear: respect had to be negotiated—the age of physical discipline had ended.

But she also taught us that many things aren’t worth worrying about. She let us roam the woods of our Atlanta neighborhood freely. We made giant muddy messes of our backyard and ourselves. But as long as we were home when called, and left the messy clothes outside, we were free.

Through it all, we learned the balance between compassion and accountability, between nurturing and discipline. We learned how to listen, how to speak, and how to love.

And through it all, we were safe in her arms.